Instead of Sheep...

 I'll have to be honest, I'm not one who's all gung-ho about gratitude lessons during Thanksgiving...we hear them every year, and it's always the same thing: "You should have gratitude the WHOLE year, but ESPECIALLY this week." I, personally, am more gung-ho about the food...although we get that every year too. But for some reason a plate full of mashed potatoes, gravy, rolls, and pie feels less repetitive than a lesson about gratitude. At any rate, I guess seventeen annual gratitude checks have gotten a little old, and I didn't feel the need to pay attention to number eighteen.

So I paid attention to the food, family, and fun. And it was fabulous! Little did I know, Heavenly Father was going to give me a gratitude lesson whether I liked it or not...

 It actually started last Monday when I went to my high school's production of White Christmas, which I had never seen before. I loved it! Especially this song. Take it away, Bing!

 

What a stud...So Thanksgiving rolls around, and, like I said: Food, family, food, fun, food...and pie :) Oh, and I have a new favorite treat which you can find here on my sister's cooking blog. I definitely ate WAY too many gooey chocolate cookies for my own good...luckily I balanced it out with my new workout routine, right? I'm a work in progress...

Sunday night sneaked up way too fast, and I still had to write a research paper. So I got back to my dorm, reunited with my dear roomies, and got down to business. I stayed up until...late. But I finished! I quickly brushed my teeth, sunk into my mattress, snuggled in my blanket and...I was still awake. I waited some more...still awake. I thought the more tired you are, the easier you fall asleep! Apparently not. So I counted down from 100, 99, 98...27, 26, 25--okay, if I get down to 1, that's just depressing. "Let's try something else..." and this lovely song popped into my head. Can you guess what it was? Bing Crosby said it all...

So I started...

I'm grateful for spending time with my family this week...

I'm grateful for good roommates...

I'm grateful for my education (that was a tough one after this beastly paper)...

...And I fell asleep counting my bleeeeeeeeesings! I know it's cheesy, but it worked for me, which makes me excited for what I'll learn (and eat) this Christmas! ;)

Confucius Say...

Do you ever think that maybe there's a little Providence in your fortune cookie?

Ok, I'm not saying I'd like to bear my testimony of fortune cookies and I know that they're true. I'm just wondering...if Heavenly Father sends us messages through the scriptures, through nature, and through other people, well...why not through food?

Regardless of whether or not it really was meant especially for me, I really liked my most recent fortune:

The near future holds a gift of contentment.

The more I live, the more I realize, life is hard (I'm brilliant, I know). And most of the time, it's not the kind of hard that can just disappear...let's face it, as much as we pray, our biology teacher is still going to give us a research paper, and we're still going to have to have an apartment cleaning check, study for tests, eat, and try to be a good person, all at once.

No, it's not all going to go away...unfortunately. And it's probably going to get harder. I get that. But I am also learning that the near future always holds a gift of contentment.

Perhaps Elder Richard G. Scott said it better than a fortune cookie in a 1995 General Conference. My wonderful RA brought up this talk today in our floor meeting. (Maybe she was just as inspired as the cookie I ate on Thursday night). Elder Scott put it this way:

"I testify that when the Lord closes one important door in your life, He shows His continuing love and compassion by opening many other compensating doors through your exercise of faith. He will place in your path packets of spiritual sunlight to brighten your way."

Life is still hard. But I've found that the harder life is, the brighter (and probably more frequent) our packets of sunlight:

A loving parent (or two)...

A call from a good friend...

A new favorite scripture...

Candy and an anonymous note at the door...

A new nephew...

The opportunity to serve...

A priesthood blessing...

A talk with a good listener...

...just to name a few.

Confucius say...I'll get through the next two weeks. And if not...Thanksgiving's right around the corner!

Food, Feuds, and Family

For the LDS General Conference broadcast last weekend, I was able to go home and watch it with my parents, brother, and his soon-to-be fiancé at the time (congratulations Sam and Jordan!). After living away from home for about a month (yes, I'm such a big girl now), I was starting to feel the first symptoms of homesickness. I was so excited to relax with my parents, have a girls night with my mom, and especially excited to eat an incredible breakfast Sunday morning--Dad's incredibly fluffy waffles with Mom's homemade syrup and cream and berries on top, accompanied by orange julius. Can life get better?

So Conference rolls along, and Saturday was great!...but by Sunday, let's just say the excitement of spending time with each other had worn off, and we were back to our normal selves (driving each other crazy).

However, the arguments were fleeting, and I still had an amazing time with my family! One of the speakers, Elder L. Tom Perry, gave an especially sweet talk on family. You can read it or watch it here.

After hearing what Elder Perry had to say about family, I am even more grateful than I was before for my beautiful family and childhood. 

I am grateful for my brother, Sam, because he has always been and always will be my best friend. Nobody could ask for a kinder brother, or a better person to talk to.

I am grateful for Jordan for treating me like her sister, and serving me when I need help, and I am so excited for her to be a part of our family.

I am grateful for Carly, my only sister, and how strong she is. I especially love her desserts! I love seeing her with her precious daughter and sweet husband, who is so loving and protective.

I love and admire my oldest brother, Rick. I am grateful for the stack of Chicago postcards he sent me, one-by-one, while he was on his mission, something I always looked forward to during that time. His wife, Kori, has become one of my dearest friends. Their three children are a joy, and I miss them SO MUCH!

I love my dad. I love that he wrestled with me when I was little. I love the panic I felt being held in his treacherous scissor lock. I love how hard he works, and how I have never heard him complain. I love how easily he makes friends, and how many people look up to him (no pun intended ;).

And finally, I love my mom. There is so much I can say about her, but I'll leave it at this: Her strength, nurturing, love, patience, and faith have reared me and taught me to be a better person. She has been my teacher and my friend, and I hope to be able to raise my children as well as she raised hers.

The Song of the Heart

"I Love The Lord". The arrangement is by Ronald Staheli. The lyrics are a paraphrase of 2 Nephi 4.

I don't want to keep re-stating what I've learned in my religion class; but this video was so powerful, I had to share it. I would recommend reading 2 Nephi 4:12-35 before listening to this song, which will give you a background for the lyrics, and show you the power that comes from using a men's choir.

. . .

Nephi was an incredible man, who I believe understood the Savior more than many. But I think my favorite stories about incredible men and women are the ones that remind me of their mortality. In other words, they're just regular people. This week, I went to a poetry reading by the former U.S. Poet Laureate Mark Strand. Allow me to geek out for just a moment...it was awesome! My roommates can attest to the fact that I was stoked to go see this reading, and they probably didn't know why. I didn't even know who Mark Strand was before I heard about this event, but when I read the words "Poet Laureate," on the page of the event, the poem, "The Lanyard" passed through my consciousness--a poem written by another former poet laureate, Billy Collins. Just take a moment to listen to him read it.  This poem changed my view of poetry, solidified my love of it, and introduced me to what the poet laureate was. I knew this would be a big deal.

When I went to the reading, Mark Strand was introduced, and up walked a man who has served as the nation's official poet. I was just about ready to idolize him without even reading any of his poetry (of course, I know idolatry is wrong, so I refrained). I enjoyed the reading, and loved his poems! But my favorite part of the reading was at the end where he invited us to ask him questions. Someone asked him what he believed was the role of poetry in today's world, and he explained his opinion. He said two things that seemed to be highlighted in the air, just for me: that poetry has a humanizing influence, and we can read things with pleasure and recognize ourselves in them. 

To me, poetry is like a masterpiece constructed out of words, transforming them and allowing you to not only hear the words, but actually feel them resonate inside of you. I often read the scriptures too much like a textbook, trying hard to focus on lists of commandments, dates, family trees, good civilizations, wicked civilizations, wars, rumors of wars...and eventually falling asleep. But every once in a while, I am able to read it like poetry. The Psalm of Nephi is one of those pockets of poetry inside a great history, that shows you the man beneath the prophet--a man who feels his own inadequacy, who's just lost his father, who has all the responsibility of a prophet thrust upon him, whose oldest brothers are jerks, but who trusts in the Lord with everything he has. 

Life is hard, but if it weren't, I'm not sure we would be capable of understanding one another. Frankly, I don't think there would be such a thing as integrity, happiness, or love if we didn't struggle. And I think that one of the most beautiful things is to be able to see people the way we see ourselves, and truly relate with them, even if they lived thousands of years ago.

Let Go and Hold On

"Hold To The Rod, The Iron Rod"
By James Christensen

I decided to begin this blog with one of my favorite things, ART, by my favorite artist, James Christensen. His story behind the art is a beautiful explanation of the poor little traveler above, but I will describe it in a nutshell (just in case you have not already found everything in common with this character and you've decided he's your new best friend. Just look at him!). Christensen wrote that this man finds himself so burdened by the things he's collected that he cannot reach up to the rod "for fear of losing something else." He said, "These may be material possessions, titles or responsibilities, but in the end they amount to the same thing: a fleeting and superficial sense of security. It is only by holding fast to our beliefs that we can navigate life with any confidence."

Well, the "iron rod" has been on my mind since studying Lehi's vision in my religion class last week, and the more I learn about it, the more I feel its relevance in my life, and the more I just want to walk into this painting and give that little poofy man a big hug! I want to tell him how silly he is for holding on to so many useless things and hoping that maybe someday he'll be able to reach the far too elevated rod. The purses, and keys, and papers are holding you back! Just let go and have faith that the rod will take you safely to where you need to go.

After a therapeutic talk with my poofy man, I hope you are noticing what I've noticed...I'll tell you in order to re-establish my credibility. I wasn't talking to the man in the painting at all, I was talking to myself. And when you talk to my poofy man, you'll be talking to yourself. It doesn't take long after pointing at others, you start to look inward. I don't think it's difficult to identify our own flaws, or even to know if we could be doing something better while we're wasting time with "material possessions, titles or responsibilities." Sometimes, I think of myself as two separate people: the thinker and the doer. We fight a lot, but we still work together. The thinker is the pure me who, though still inexperienced and naïve, knows right from wrong, and knows who I should be. The doer is a little more susceptible to carnality (Facebook, Pinterest, you know the type). But the thinker tries to keep the doer in line, and as painful as it is to the thinker, the doer is a reflection on her. The doer has been referred to by a different name, the natural man, and keeping it in line is a lofty challenge for everyone. But that's why we have the "iron rod." Although I'm still learning, I'm starting to truly realize the meaning of "holding fast to our beliefs," because that is our only source of true confidence.